Rocky Road Part II

(later. . .)

Did I say I wasn't going to enjoy a free ice cream cone? As if.

Rocky Road

Today is free cone day at Ben & Jerry's. Under normal circumstances this would cheer me up. BUT, my husband just called to tell me that he did not get the job he's been interviewing for all freakin' month. Oh cruel fate, why. WHY?

Now I HAVE to go to B&J and I probably won't even enjoy it. I know I shouldn't partake of the cone with its evil lactose enzymes. There will be consequences for such indulgences. Trust me.

And yet, I have no choice because I can't drink my sorrows away. I mean I'd rather have a gassy baby then a drunk one.

Hot Fudge

Day One Back in the Office

I return to find assorted cards and gifts waiting for me on my desk.
Awwwwww.
I work with some of THE most thoughtful people. I truly do.
So why doesn't this consideration rub off on upper management?
Damn their stone cold hearts.

All in all, the day wasn't quite as hellish as I expected it to be.
And I couldn't stay in a foul mood after reading this:
Your virginity breeds mites, much like a cheese
GOD I've missed my Insult-A-Day desk calendar.

You Scream, I Scream

Reports indicate that stay-at-home moms would earn $131,471 in annual salary if they were actually paid for all the work they do. A six figure salary people!

Right now I am as far away from a six figure salary as you can get. And struggling with the fact that tomorrow I get to return to my job for a reduced salary.

The question is, will my actual workload be reduced? Will I be assigned fewer books or is the expectation that I just have fewer days to complete the work? Hmmmmmmm.

I've recently read a lot about women being pushed out of their jobs rather than opting to stay home, about the work place bias against mothers, about the maternal wall.

I'll take that $131, 471. Large bills please.

I am the Dairy Queen

This how the working mother rolls on her last day of maternity leave:

7:30 AM
Wake up to the sweet sound of toddler tears
Put on DVD so she can take a bath
Get dressed
8:00 AM
Make breakfast--oatmeal for little boy, waffles for big boy
Put in a load of laundry
Nurse baby
Write short children's story for potential freelance gig
8:30 AM
Pry husband out of bed
Get kids dressed
Email children's story (Please God no typos)
9:00 AM
More laundry
Write grocery list
Gather today's banking
9:30-12:00 PM
Get out of the house!
Mani and pedi with a side of latte
Pick up dry-cleaning
12:30 PM
Make lunch
Pump (no, not iron)
1:00 PM
Grocery shopping
1:30 PM
Take kids to park
2:30 PM
Administer TLC to scrapped knee
3:00 PM
Check email (story has potential!)
Finish story and send full draft
Roast pork for dinner
Nurse baby
5:00 PM
Pick up little boy from Pre-K
Bring in bikes off porch before it rains
5:30 PM
Make Dinner
6:30 PM
Bath time
7:00 PM
Nurse baby
Get kids into pajamas
8:00 PM
Put kids to bed
Update LinkedIN profile
Check Myspace
Blog

Multitasking is my bitch.


I can see why I'm not allowed to work from home. I just can't seem to get anything done.

Two Scoops: Less Money, More Problems

I need a game plan. How am I going to pay the mortgage and household utilities, buy groceries (which cost more than ever with the new baby), make the car payment on the new KIA we just bought, afford the ridiculous gas prices to drive said KIA, and keep up with the gazillion other hidden costs it takes to raise a family. On $1900.00 a month? Yes, I "said" $1900.00 a month. Pitiful. I know.

For the moment I'll pretend I can do this. I'm going to try and muster up all the freelance work I can find. I'll pull the boys out of daycare. And this is all I can do. There are too many unknown factors for me to make long term plans. I have no idea how long my husband will be out of work. But I need to brace myself for the worst.

Rereading these paragraphs makes me think about the conversation my boss and I had about my maternity leave. This was in back in January. I told her my plans to work from home and follow the same schedule I had with my youngest son. Perhaps she should have told me then that I couldn't work from home. It would have been helpful to have three months to plan instead of ten days. It would have been the considerate thing to do. Should I assume it was a deliberate move to 1) avoid a confrontation with a pregnant woman and 2) ensure I would actually come back to the office when my leave came to an end? Like I even need to ask. If she pulls the rug out from under me at the last second then I have less time to react.

Dang. That's cold.

Today's Flavor: Thunder Cloud

This inaugural post is brought to you by an anonymous low-paying publishing job and the letters B & S.

Next week, I return to work from a twelve week maternity leave. No big deal. I've done this two other times and am prepared for the highs and low of juggling kids and work. Except, three days ago my boss called me to tell me I can no longer work from home. It seems the demands of my job--all the reading and rereading--simply can't be done anywhere but the office. My boss kindly offered me the unique opportunity stay at home two days a week. For $16,000 a year less than my current salary. REALLY, CAN I PLEASE?!? Because that would be awesome.

I can smell the rancid aroma of mounting debt already.

Cherry On Top
My husband just lost his job and my boss knows this. But she is not one to be swayed by dire circumstances.


Nuts?
Four years ago, when I was pregnant with my youngest son, I was up for a promotion. At the time, I was told I'd be given my new title (and all important raise) when I returned to the office after my maternity leave ended. I came back to the office in June. In July I asked my boss about my promotion since she makes a habit of announcing these fine achievements during our weekly Monday morning meetings. She told me. . .wait for it. .. there JUST wasn't enough money in the budget to promote me. Yeah. Smells like discrimination to me too.


So thank you low-paying publishing job! Next week my husband, three children, and I will be one big, happy family living on 3/5 of my income.